6. And he calls him “sir” to this day.
I was confronted by a 6’4″ ex-marine CIA agent hurling the taxi driver out of the cab for overcharging his daughter.
7. Highly illogical.
Brought my first college boyfriend home for Thanksgiving – we were greeted by my parents in full Star Trek uniforms, dad was wearing spock ears, both giving the “live long and prosper” salute. They ordered pizza and the delivery guy asks my dad why he didn’t just have the pizza beamed over.
8. When your in-laws are Mario and Luigi.
They pretended to only speak Italian for three hours.
9. Yeah, that was no accident, dude.
This happened with my first girlfriend back in high school. So I went to her house for dinner to meet her parents for the first time. There was still a little while before dinner was ready, and it was a beautiful night, so we decided to take a walk through the park by her house. She forgot her cell phone at her house, and her parents tried calling her for dinner. They freaked out and assumed I kidnapped her. They called the cops. We walked back a few minutes later as the cops showed up. Pretty awkward. I stayed for dinner so as not to be rude and nobody said a word the whole time.
10. When forced communal showering isn’t even the worst part of the story.
My ex-boyfriend wanted me to meet his parents, and he told me they wanted to meet me too. We decided to drive up to their place in the bay area (we lived in Orange County at the time) for Thanksgiving.
I’m white, and he (and thus his parents) are Chinese. I normally wouldn’t mention this, but apparently my whiteness made them not approve of me, and therefore not actually want to meet me. I didn’t know they didn’t want to meet me, otherwise I wouldn’t have driven six hours and showed up at their house. When we knocked on their door, his mother answered, looked at me and said (in Cantonese) “I told you not to bring the white girl here”. More was said in Cantonese (I understood none of it).
To save money, his parents did not have the boiler on, nor did they have heat in the house. Not having a boiler meant not having hot water, and therefore not having showers. To remedy this, they had a membership at 24 hour fitness, where they went every night to have a shower. They insisted that we go to 24 hour fitness for a shower, literally 15 minutes after showing up at their house. 24 hour fitness has communal showering. I’m absolutely terrified of communal showering. I had to get naked with my boyfriend’s mother, 15 minutes after meeting her. At that point, she had never spoken a word to me in English. The first actual communication she showed me was to thrust a hairdryer in my hands.
Anyway, the next few days were excruciatingly uncomfortable. Next to nothing was said in English at all, and I felt like everybody hated me. I spent several days just being as quiet, submissive, and polite as possbile. I was sent to his mother’s garden to pull weeds in the sun for a few hours, and after that she apparently began liking me. Later in the week she decided I needed a checkup at the doctor (for what reason, I don’t know). Turns out she scheduled me for a vaginal exam, conducted by a man. A man who I don’t know. A man who spoke in really broken English.
I explained to her that I was not comfortable with any of this. It was horrible and embarrassing.