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20+ Tweets About Mercury Being In Retrograde That’ll Make You Forget Mercury Is In Retrograde

Mercury is in retrograde, and we all know what that means, right?
 Anyone? I don’t. I suppose I could’ve done a little research for this article, but let’s be honest. It doesn’t mean a damn thing. Mercury being in retrograde means you have an excuse for all of the poor decisions that led to you being in a bad situation. Not that I’m judging you. I love anything that allows me to act without taking responsibility for my actions. “Sorry, mercury is in retrograde.” “Sorry, I was really drunk.” “Sorry, but God has a plan for everything.” They all work, so get out there and do some damage while you can still blame it on Mercury.

22. There’s plenty of dick in the sea, and it’s never a wrong time to go fishing.

21. Enjoy it while it lasts, because when it’s over you’re just an asshole.

20. Sounds like everyone else’s problem to me.

19. *opens laptop and ruins everything with that*

18. Burn your house down before the wildfire gets to you.

17. Non believers don’t get any of the sweet, sweet excuses.

16. Sorry, it’s out of my hands.

15. Don’t talk about it, be about it.

14. Put yourself out there and see what happens.

13. Like, weird how? Tbh they’re all weird.