13.
My girlfriend wanted another dog but I didn’t so we compromised and got another dog pic.twitter.com/ZIjNfSi1zo
— rey (@reyldzz) March 24, 2018
12.
One of my favorite games to play is “is my headache from dehydration, caffeine withdrawal, lack of proper nutrition, my ponytail, stress, lack of sleep, not wearing my glasses or brain tumor?”
— parker (@pmilbs_) March 15, 2018
11.
In 8th grade, I was singing “If You Seek Amy” by Britney Spears and a girl named Rebecca told me that it was code for “f-u-c-k” and from that day on I was a woman.. That is my coming of age story. Rebecca, wherever you are, thank you.
— la loba (@vickto_willy) March 20, 2018
10.
He was actually mad he couldn’t do the shoot dance, I’m dead lmao??? pic.twitter.com/1zgTfpS63K
— Abigail A (@missabigail11) March 15, 2018
9.
“This is a nice place to take a pic”… pic.twitter.com/bRWd3jysJ9
— Heba? (@Heba_1123) March 13, 2018
8.
if you’re having a bad day at least you didnt get pied with the phrase ‘I’m busy everyday for the rest of the year’ ??? pic.twitter.com/QP4P94tA6T
— Amy Burgess (@amy_burgess10) March 12, 2018
7.
this the strongest curve of 2018 pic.twitter.com/aTY3TK0wzQ
— kire tweets (@habitualkire) March 11, 2018
6.
Me: “I’m going to take a quick shower brb”
*45 minutes later*
Me: pic.twitter.com/ICIiQnqwXa
— SaltyMusicStan x2 (@SaltyMusicStan) March 16, 2018
5.
What are some cures for insomnia that DO NOT involve drinking less caffeine and alcohol or turning off your phone and computer or getting exercise or meditating or reducing stress in any way?
— Bess Kalb (@bessbell) March 15, 2018
4.
Me: i could use a na-
Girl who used her parents money to spend an entire week blacked out in Cancun for spring break: nap? you mean a siesta amigo. the weather is soooo nice here in Mexico. wanderlust™? is a way of life, it’s so so important to travel while ur still young
— Greg Sheffer (@gsheffr) March 14, 2018
3.
— popular slut (@kindslut) March 12, 2018
2.
Wifi: *connected*
Me: then fucking act like it pic.twitter.com/0sMKeOUuU1— babygirl (@sacrificehoes) March 15, 2018
1.
i realized women are far more powerful than men when i saw my gf eat 2 fucking popeyes biscuits in a row without any beverage it was truly remarkable
— alex tan (@mineifiwildout) March 12, 2018