I’ll admit that when it comes to flipping through the channels to find something that doesn’t make me want to drink bleach, I usually land on one of two options. First, Seinfeld. Because, hey, it’s Seinfeld. Second is Shark Tank.
I’m not really sure why I love this show so much. Maybe it’s the mere Schadenfreude of watching other people embarrass themselves with dumber ideas than the ones I have. Or maybe it’s because Seinfeld wasn’t on. Either way, it’s TV magic.
But of all those cool products that receive an investment, how many are actually out there selling like hot cakes? Well, I took the liberty of tracking a few of my favorites down on Amazon, and here’s what I came up with:
1. This inflatable travel pillow/hoodie combo, appropriately named, that’s right: Hoodie-Pillow.
For a cheaper than you can buy a headrest in the airport, you can tackle the two biggest problems with flying: finding a comfortable sleeping position and having to acknowledge the existence of others!
2. Scrub-Daddy, the only combination father-figure/sponge you’ll ever need.
Promising and brutally honest review: “Makes cleaning almost fun!” Get a 6-pack for $8.
3. The ReadeREST, so you don’t lose your s**t looking for your headphones or glasses ever again.
Probably the only way for me not to lose something, especially my headphones or glasses, is to attach it to my clothes , and this little thing that does via magnet. Pretty cool. Price: $10.
4. Baker’s Edge, so everyone gets a corner piece, or if you’re eating the whole pan yourself, all your pieces are corner pieces.
Ok, this wasn’t one of Oprah’s Favorite Things for nothing. Price: $50.
5. Ezpz Happy Mat, so you don’t get so sick of cleaning up after your kids’ meals that you just stop feeding them.
No joke, I’ve got one. It’s legit. Easy clean-up. Dishwasher safe. I mean, sure they’re still going to throw food all over the walls, but this thing will minimize the damage for $25.
6. This floating coffee mug that protects your nice surfaces from damage, assuming you have nice surfaces.
$10 seems pretty reasonable. Especially when the alternative is your wife yelling at you to use a coaster.
7. Spike Ball, which is something that apparently all the kids are playing now.
Never played, but I saw the episode where they pitched it. It looks pretty fun. Like bocce, but for people with some level of athletic skill. $60.
8. Chewable coffee bites for when you don’t feel like standing in line at a coffee shop.
Two cups of coffee worth of caffeine for the price of like 1/10th of Starbucks.
9. Air Cork, the wine preserver for people who don’t just finish the whole bottle in one sitting, like me.
Get it for $28.00.
10. The Fizzics beer flavor enhancer, which somehow makes beer taste better.
Better beer for $119 seems like a steal.
11. Freaker, the one-size-fits-all beer coozie.
Hard to forget this episode. The guy selling these was pretty much a what I’d imagine a magician meth addict is like. Anyway, these things are pretty cool and come in a variety of styles for only $12.
12. Phone Soap, the UV sanitizer for all that feces on your iPhone.
You don’t want to know how dirty your phone really is, but for $35 you don’t need to worry about it. BONUS: Your phone also gets a nice little suntan!
13. This back support, so you do don’t look like The Hunchback of Notre Dame by the time you’re 40.
Sure, the Better Back may look silly, but not as silly as lurching around looking like you’re bent over at the waist your whole life. Price: $59.
14. One of these things you see in bathrooms a lot now.
Apparently I’ve been taking s**ts wrong my entire life. The Squatty Potty gets me back in touch with my primal ancestry by helping me take dumps in the position nature intended. Better for your colon, and digestive system, allegedly. Price: $24.99.
15. The Chord Buddy, the easiest way to learn to play the guitar so you can bust it out at parties and have everyone hate you.
Get it for $50.
16. The One-Z nursing pillow.
Another thing I own personally. It’s a great way to multi-task (AKA, look at your phone) while nursing a newborn. Cheaper than most baby stuff, for sure.
17. Frends, AKA “those headphones you always see people wearing.”
People rave about them.
Price: $180, which isn’t bad compared to f**king Beats by Dre.
18. Unshrinkit, the only way to still fit in your high school jeans*.
*I don’t know if this will help you fit into your high school jeans, but it supposedly helps you un-shrink other stuff. $20.
19. Eco Nuts, which is also what I assume Al Gore calls his testicles.
Allegedly these reduce drying time by 10%-25%. Price: $20.
20. Simply Fit, the workout balance board I’d probably die trying.
Get your core jacked for $39.
21. Plate Topper, the ideal leftover storage solution for people as lazy as me.
Why bust out a bunch of Tupperware when you can just keep your leftovers on the plate you’re going to use later anyway? $12 for 2.
22. Hatch Baby!
This might be classic over-parenting, but using built in Wi-Fi you can keep track of your baby’s weight, feeding habits, diaper changes, and more. Beats logging it manually, which is what I did with my firstborn. Price: $250.
23. Lonely people, give yourself a back massage with the Q-Flex.
Optimized for acupressure and deep tissue massage. $24.
24. The Drain Strain no-clog sink stopper.
No more clogs, guaranteed. $11.
25. The Drop Stop will keep you from losing your phone every time you slam on your brakes.
Get it for $20.
26. NerdWax, the best way to keep your glasses from falling off during sex or other sweaty activities.
This is the #1 selling Shark Tank product to date. Get it for $11.
27. This motion activated toilet night light.
Nothing more painful that having to turn on the bathroom light in the middle of the night. This light is not only motion activated and subtle, but it changes colors.
Get it for $11.
28. A bullet beer opener, made from real U.S. Military shell casings.
Just going to steer clear of this one politically and tell you to get one for $13.
29. SockTabs prevent you from losing the socks you wear on your feet and may or may not use for “other things,” you pervert.
Get them on “the Amazons” for $22.99
30. This swimsuit is designed to make you look like you have a hairy chest.
You can get it from Amazon for $50.
To be clear, we may receive a portion of the sales generated from this post, which we will then use to try and fund our own Shark Tank ideas.