Summer inevitably presents a whole new array of health concerns. From sunburns, to dehydration, to body odor (which, yes, I consider a health concern), it’s important to adjust your hygiene and skincare routine during the warmer months.
And apparently, that adjustment should also involve vaginal care.
Recently, Teen Vogue tweeted out an article with the social media headline, “How To Get Your Best Summer Vagina Ever.”
How to Get Your Best Summer Vagina Ever https://t.co/NSvEqADpOV pic.twitter.com/xYMFbe4iTk
— Teen Vogue (@TeenVogue) May 30, 2018
The headline of the article itself is slightly less salacious, and is entitled “How to Keep Your Vagina Healthy All Summer.” However, the tweet version is definitely giving people pause.
I mean, aren’t vaginas suitable for all seasons??
In all honesty, the article means well. While the Twitter headline certainly seems to imply that waxing and vajazzling are on the menu, the piece actually endeavors to discuss best practices when it comes to water, sweat and sand getting into your swimsuit area. Basically, it’s all about how to keep your vag happy and avoid any unwanted/uncomfortable yeast infections during the humid summer months — which, for teenage girls, is actually incredibly useful information.
However, Teen Vogue definitely opted for a more sensationalist angle in their tweet, and the hilarity of a “summer vagina” was not lost on Twitter.
People wasted no time in mercilessly roasting the headline for the rather silly implication that vaginas are somehow seasonal.
Oh God, I’ve been using the same one all year https://t.co/eTPPtG0kS2
— Geraldine (@everywhereist) June 1, 2018
But where do I store my winter one? https://t.co/OQASn9iYWg
— Jojo Moyes (@jojomoyes) May 30, 2018
call me old-fashioned, but when the time comes, i’ll be asking the surgeon for all-season model https://t.co/ukpvJKyYuc
— Mel Stone (@melstonemusic) May 30, 2018
Last summer’s vagina will be so jealous. https://t.co/M2jSsDqJkR
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) May 31, 2018
Best get my summer penis out of storage and give it a dust off too I suppose. https://t.co/RDVWfXD2xo
— Nick (@typejunky) May 30, 2018
FFS I’ve only just got my perfect springtime ovaries https://t.co/KuUrJsSFDs
— SheRa Marley-Threepwood (@SheRa_Marley) May 30, 2018
1. make sure to use moth balls when you put it away in storage for the winter https://t.co/iQyI8FdruQ
— T. Becket Adams (@BecketAdams) May 31, 2018
oh god i haven’t even taken the snow tires off my vagina yet https://t.co/AEjQDL1vsl
— Molly Priddy (@mollypriddy) May 31, 2018
Step One) Leave a trail of breadcrumbs leading to a cardboard box that’s propped open with a stick https://t.co/09yuJZY2KY
— Eddie Bowley (@Eddache_) May 31, 2018
— Cat Karskens (@saikocat) May 30, 2018
*pours a litre of aperol into underpants*
*adds orange slice garnish*
— the etiquette bitch ✨ (@Becca_DP) May 30, 2018
All joking aside: hopefully, this extra online attention will actually encourage more readership and help to inform young women on how to keep their crotch comfy and healthy during the sweltering summer. (You laugh, but vagina health is real, yo.)
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go grab a lil’ paper umbrella for my nether region …