Being hot is a big component of most celebrities’ jobs. If we knew what kind of work they put into maintaining that hotness, we’d probably think their lives are pretty strange. I know that, because it’s exactly what happened to Mark Wahlberg when he shared his daily routine on Instagram. Most of his day is dedicated to working out, eating really high protein and low carb foods, and golfing. He also wakes up at 2:30 am, for some reason, even though it seems like the whole process could start much later.
Wahlberg got trolled pretty hard by the Internet that day, but the master troll, Ryan Reynolds, cooked up something even better for The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. It’s a time table of his weekly schedule that mocks Wahlberg and himself. Also, Paddington 2. While a lot of it is weird, it’s about what you’d expect from Reynolds:
A schedule that only includes one day of parenting and weeping in front of a stranger sounds rad. There’s also about six hours sets aside for picking a new hairstyle, which I would say is an extremely low estimate. That’s only a fraction of the amount of time I put into hair choices, and no one wants my hair on camera.
Anyone can have the schedule sent to them by emailing [email protected], and getting it back as an out of office reply. Yes, the whole thing is basically a promotion for his liquor brand, Aviation Gin, and also for his wife Blake Lively’s new movie, A Simple Favor. Ryan Reynolds is great at promoting himself in jokey, engaging ways. This is the synergy we want. If he can also make fun of Mark Wahlberg, even better! Though Reynolds has objected on Twitter and said it has nothing to do with Wahlberg:
This is insane… As far as I know, I released my schedule first. And I’d never spend 6 hrs coming up with a new hairstyle. That’s ridiculous. I was only looking at SKETCHES of hairstyles. It takes way longer than 6 hours. https://t.co/ZA20FzXEdX
— Ryan Reynolds (@VancityReynolds) September 14, 2018
There’s one thing we know is for sure true about Ryan Reynolds: he’s always making fun of somebody.