I know that everyone is deep in the throes of Royal Wedding Mania since the engagement of Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, but I think I’ve just officially encountered the highest possible peak of this hysteria: a published magazine article about Meghan Markle’s single, minuscule gray hair.
It all began when Marie Claire decided that it was a slow news day and that an article about a gray hair that had been spotted on top of Markle’s head would be JUST THE THING to help keep the public informed.
One can’t help but wonder: where were all the think pieces about Brad Pitt’s distinguished gray hairs when they began to appear? Or Ben Affleck’s? Or literally any other middle-aged male celebrity who’s chosen to carelessly flaunt their natural hair color?
(Those questions are entirely rhetorical, though, because you and I both know that the answer to all of them is: “They don’t exist, thank you sexism!”)
In a piece which was somehow not an article for The Onion, writer Sally Holmes writes, “Important news: Meghan Markle, human, has a gray hair. She revealed this truth when she left the house and it was, well, right there on her head.”
(I can’t be sure here, but … perhaps this is what people are referring to when they mention a “hot take”?)
Obviously, Twitter was not impressed. And even though Marie Claire eventually deleted the tweet, the internet wasted no time in dragging the publication for its apparent lack of editorial prowess.
if meghan markle’s lone gray hair on her head is news, my gray pube is available for interviews
— Tracy Boomeisha-Ann Clayton (@brokeymcpoverty) April 5, 2018
.@marieclaire looking for Meghan Markle’s gray hair pic.twitter.com/xyIjmiBIxn
— Colin Diersing (@cdiersing) April 5, 2018
Marie Claire over here writing about a single grey hair on the glorious head of Meghan Markle. Adjust your perspective, this is ridiculous. pic.twitter.com/SnVnTfAfus
— Liana Aghajanian (@LianaAgh) April 5, 2018
When you hear that Marie Claire did a bad tweet about Meghan Markle pic.twitter.com/J0YHngs0hv
— Josh Billinson (@jbillinson) April 5, 2018
Meghan Markle missed 1 appointment with her colorist and Marie Claire decided to put their journalism degrees to use pic.twitter.com/6ddlqFfHkU
— Lola Milaje?? (@_LoveLO) April 5, 2018
meghan markle is just like us: she’s also creeped the f out that someone studied the roots of her head like that @marieclaire
— Tanya Chen (@Tanya_Chen) April 5, 2018
Marie Claire: Meghan Markle Is A Human
— Kassia Haynes (@ThisIsKassia) April 5, 2018
WOAH #sugartax pic.twitter.com/rTG4eP7w1N
— Matt Kilcoyne (@MRJKilcoyne) April 5, 2018
I’m younger than Meghan Markle and have WAY more gray hairs. Where’s my article, @marieclaire? pic.twitter.com/YC0EeCGUIi
— Anne Hogan (@Anne_Hogan) April 5, 2018
Long story short: people get gray hairs, occasionally regardless of age, and it is in no way a news story. Or, if it is, then we need to devote entire groups of reporters to gray hair coverage, because there are a LOT of missed news opportunities out there.
Also, I think I speak for everyone when I say: can Meghan Markle JUST LIVE??