What do we REALLY know about the sponge who lives in a pineapple under the sea? We know he’s absorbent, yellow and porous, but that’s pretty much all we’re given in terms of background.
Recently, Celeste Yim underwent an exhaustive investigation into an unanswered question about Spongebob Squarepants: is he a dish sponge, or a true sea sponge?
Celeste was firmly in the dish sponge camp and didn’t even think it was a question.
I have only just discovered that Spongebob is a sea sponge? I thought he was maybe a regular sponge with an eclectic lifestyle, like a white man living in Southeast Asia ✌
— Celeste Yim (@celestrogen) May 22, 2018
Honestly, she didn’t even realize until talking with some friends that this could be a contentious topic of conversation.
To be fair, it’s a damn cartoon, so, is it really so crazy to assert that Spongebob could be a dish sponge?
Kinda threw out reality when he ate his own GD hands like popcorn in the Spongebob movie????????? pic.twitter.com/F3XSeROkaZ
— Celeste Yim (@celestrogen) May 22, 2018
Celeste even started a Twitter poll to determine Spongebobs origins once and for all.
PLEASE VOTE. Spongebob Squarepants™️ is a …
— Celeste Yim (@celestrogen) May 22, 2018
Everyone seemed to be in agreement about Spongebob being a dish sponge — especially considering the evidence.
But this is Spongebob and Patrick on land… pic.twitter.com/qx79PcyIQT
— LaToya Ferguson (@lafergs) May 22, 2018
Someone even came up with a pretty plausible theory to explain Spongebob’s lifestyle.
working theory is dish spongebob and his pineapple were tossed from the same kitchen and he’s making the best of it as ocean pollution
— Jill Krajewski (@JillKrajewski) May 22, 2018
Apparently, even the Spongebob Squarepants Broadway musical is in the dish sponge camp.
The Broadway iteration of the movie uses a bunch of dish sponges and time is really running out for sea-sponge-believers. (But I guess if the theory is that SS is a sea sponge cut into a square and put back into the sea, this could still hold water?…) https://t.co/WKl4Gx6ClJ
— Celeste Yim (@celestrogen) May 22, 2018
However, there were certainly some who were firmly in the sea sponge camp (and who have clearly watched the show more than once, unlike Celeste — JUST SAYING).
Exhibit A: Filter Feeding
Exhibit B: Reproduction Via Budding
Exhibit C: Regeneration pic.twitter.com/lyHK0q9K83— Amar Risbud (@bummer_no_b) May 22, 2018
I’m not thrilled but relieved to hear the first logical pro-sea argument https://t.co/TBTrZCMr2e
— Celeste Yim (@celestrogen) May 22, 2018
Celeste stuck to her guns though, attempting to parse out meaning from the theme song lyrics.
Also just realized that the lyrics “drop on the deck snd[sic] flop like a fish” might refer to his inability to breathe on land like a fish…an underwater creature…..like a sea….s…ponge……… I’ve never known peace pic.twitter.com/ShtzayoX2o
— Celeste Yim (@celestrogen) May 22, 2018
She also explained why she had become so fanatical about this debate.
This debate began because my idiot friend explained to me that this (genius) jealous girlfriend meme I made while I was inebriated “cant just be a choice between two things” and “Spongebob didnt CHOOSE to live under the sea anyways, he just DOES because hes a sea sponge” pic.twitter.com/9879NvF2eX
— Celeste Yim (@celestrogen) May 22, 2018
Honestly, she is seriously overthinking this cartoon series.
I dont have the answers so let me offer u this, another bad and specific meme that I probably didn’t do right. Sometimes the truth isn’t out there and all that matters in the end is: conviction. Either way, the sun shall rise again in Bikini Bottom (or not bc underwater??). Gnite pic.twitter.com/A6fAbuLW4h
— Celeste Yim (@celestrogen) May 22, 2018
Spongebob can be whatever we want him to be.
I used to think he was a cheese… https://t.co/ZFlVQNABSw
— Toni♡ (@leftcoaast) May 22, 2018
This is so important to me https://t.co/qhgNr2hHJa
— Celeste Yim (@celestrogen) May 22, 2018
Although, apparently, lots of people think he’s a dish sponge.
The votes have been counted and the results are in… The People’s Spongebob™️ is a mf DISH SPONGE. Nothing but respect for my dish sponge, thank u for ur validation https://t.co/TN29t9EYMD
— Celeste Yim (@celestrogen) May 23, 2018
While I appreciate Celeste’s “research,” I gotta jump in here and point out that Spongebob’s parents and grandma are all clearly sea sponges (re: their natural shape) and they all live under the sea.
So, I really don’t think that Spongebob is supposed to be a manmade dish sponge.
(Unless he was adopted, which I suppose is a plausible theory.)
What I’m trying to say is: THIS ?? DISH ?? SPONGE ?? THEORY ?? IS ?? TRASH ??
Sorry, Celeste. I just call ’em like I see ’em.